Keep outside, please!

It’s been 19 years since I’ve been to Toronto, Canada. It was the only time I’ve ever been there and I remember that as a 15 year old boy I really liked the city, especially the fact that you could go from one building to another underground. There were a lot of passages underground so people don’t need to walk on the streets when it’s freezing cold.

I remember I loved the ice-hockey Hall Of Fame museum (although at the time I didn’t know much about the sport), I lost myself inside the self-proclaimed The World’s Largest Bookstore and I bought a lot of records at a store called Sam, The Record Man.

We also went to Niagara Falls and on Sunday night we used to go to a place called Whistling Oyster where they served delicious lobster bisque. It was March so it was still fairly cold, perfect for bisque.

However, what I remember the most about this trip (besides the fact that I was at a great Italian restaurant called Mario’s when Michael Jordan made his first game after returning to the NBA) was a particular incident that happened in an Irish pub.

It was St. Patrick’s and me, my father and my mother, having already eaten, decided to go to the Irish Pub that was located at the ground floor in the hotel we were staying just to drink something. This was about 8 PM.

It was weird because it was Saint Patrick and the Irish pub was empty, maybe because people were still celebrating in the streets, I don’t know. Anyway, there were only us and a rather old man having a beer in the pub. All of a sudden there came in a blonde girl with big tits and by the way she was behaving she had had more than a few beers, and definitely, something more than beer.

Now, she comes into the pub, goes directly to the Chinese guy that was working at the bar and starts to try to kiss him and hug him and invade the bar. The only thing the Chinese guy could say was:

–          Keep outside, please. Please keep outside.

He panicked. He was probably an illegal alien or something because he was rather scared that something might happen. Then she gives up the bar and walks in our direction. She stops and sits at the old man’s lap and starts to whisper things into his ear and caress his green tie.

Finally, her friends arrive and drag her outta there. The old Irish man was so frightened that he asked if he could sit at our table to talk! He said that the girl started telling him he was sexy and he didn’t understand anything.

Turns out he was rather nice guy that lived in Hamilton (just outside Toronto) and told us a little bit about his life.

Be sure to check out my book “Straight And Lethal”.

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